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  1. Morning Tweet: A Jose Canseco profanity barrage to start your morning

    Feb 15, 2010, 9:00 AM EDT

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    Jose Canseco, diplomat. Is our hero auditioning for the WWE? No, what’s sticking in his craw currently is the fact that MMA’s Strikeforce won’t sign him. I have no idea why; unless it’s because he’s 45, and lost his MMA Dream debut in May, 2009, just 1:17 into the match. Recently Canseco and Herschel Walker…

  2. Stubby Clapp's Video Vault: 'C' is for cheerleader that's good enough for me

    Feb 14, 2010, 3:30 PM EDT

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    Kind of like the Cookie Monster if the Cookie Monster were a maneater. And a mascot for the Raptors. And not a muppet. Well, you see what I mean. Maybe. What we have is some sort of inflatable mascot thingy engorging itself on a cheerleader. And to think, that girl was only working the cheerleader…

  3. Does this mean I should cancel my panty raid in Olympic Village?

    Feb 14, 2010, 12:15 PM EDT

    Remember that scene from Revenge of the Nerds when the Tri-Lams orchestrate a panty raid on the Pi-Delta-Pi’s sorority house? Of course you do. You know, when Betty Childs finds Lewis Skolnik hiding in the shower and he let’s out that “Panty Raid!” with the classic nerd laugh “Herh hehr hehr hehr hehr!” afterward? Wait,…

  4. Member of U.S. curling team 'one of those guys'

    Feb 14, 2010, 10:45 AM EDT

    You know the type: a suave, self-absorbed ladies’ man, wooing women with the same tired old shtick yet it works with alarming consistency; the kind of guy who would steal your college girlfriend – you know, if you could have actually somehow managed to get a girlfriend in college. I had always assumed that curlers…

  5. If you ever wanted to see a photo of John Daly peeing, urine luck

    Feb 14, 2010, 9:15 AM EDT

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    Hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go. Even if you happen to be participating in the AT&T Pebble Beach National Pro-Am while your playing partner Tony Romo stands nearby. TMZ reports that this photo of John Daly’s Personal Pee Party occurred on Thursday. Wow, playing at one of the greatest courses in all of…

  6. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha … wipe out! Spectators swept away by wave at surf competition

    Feb 13, 2010, 11:14 PM EDT

    I asked a guy once why he attended the Mavericks surf competition each year, even though the traffic is horrendous, it’s crowded and you can’t see much from the beach. His answer: “It’s the only way I can feel like I’m part of the event.” He got his wish this year. At around 9:30 this…

  7. Stubby Clapp's Video Vault: Oh dear, this is almost too awkward to watch

    Feb 13, 2010, 3:30 PM EDT

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    Oprah, Oprah, Oprah! That thing on Drew Brees’ face is a birthmark! One would assume that Oprah Winfrey, before sitting down with Super Bowl XLIV MVP Drew Brees, would have been aware of his birthmark, or had been told that Drew Brees has a birthmark on the right side of his face, or at the…

  8. If Tanith Belbin could turn back time, if she could find a way…

    Feb 13, 2010, 2:00 PM EDT

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    …she would have brought some Cher posters to Vancouver, she’d say. Yikes. That is just awful. Simply atrocious. Please accept my apologies for that terrible Cher reference, but bear with me, there is a method to my madness. Well, it’s not so much of a method per se, but I digress. One of the more…

  9. Rick Reilly: condescending to Canadians, mouth-breathing tool

    Feb 13, 2010, 12:30 PM EDT

    I know, breaking news, right? Rick Reilly used to be one of the most well-respected, insightful journalists working in sports. But now, with a buttload of money stuffed in his bank account courtesy of the Worldwide Leader, appears to be content writing insipid, idiotic drivel. Case in point: his most recent column, “Oh, Canada: A…

  10. Sadly, Walter Morrison has been shuffled off this mortal coil, probably on a flying disc of some sort

    Feb 13, 2010, 10:45 AM EDT

    It’s funny how things go in this crazy world. One minute, you are living your life to the fullest, and then before you know it, WHAM-O! You’re gone. Walter Frederick Johnson, the man credited with inventing one of the most simple yet entertaining recreational toys ever, the Frisbee, passed away Tuesday at his home in…

  11. 'Says she wants to dance 'cause she likes to groove, so come on fatso and just bust a move'

    Feb 13, 2010, 9:15 AM EDT

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    Evidently, Dallas Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips receives all of his ample booty-shaking advice from the 1989 hip hop classic by Young MC, “Bust A Move,” because that is exactly what he did when he joined some lovely ladies on the dance floor to participate in a little dancing to the Village People’s “YMCA.” It…

  12. Ethiopian Nordic skier (wait, what?) hopes for Olympic gold

    Feb 12, 2010, 5:00 PM EDT

    If your native language doesn’t even have a word for snow, chances are you’re not going to be standing on the medal stand in Vancouver this year. But wait, here’s Robel Teklemariam of Ethiopia, who is that nation’s entire Winter Olympic team. A Nordic skier (yep) who is entered in the 15-kilometer race, Teklemariam was…

  13. Friday Blogdome: British soccer players refuse to appear in anti-homophobia ad

    Feb 12, 2010, 3:00 PM EDT

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    There are no options for gay footballers. It’s no surprise that homophobia is prevalent in sports (and moreso in men’s sports), but the Football Association had appeared to be making steps in the right direction. The FA had hired advertising/marketing agency Ogilvy to produce an anti-homophobia ad as part of the “Kick It Out” campaign,…

  14. More random destruction from our favorite redneck Saints fans

    Feb 12, 2010, 2:00 PM EDT

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    We knew as soon as the Saints made it to the Super Bowl that it spelled the death warrant for several more old TVs at a certain Louisiana compound. You probably remember back during the regular season, when we showed you this video of Saints fans shooting a widescreen television following a victory over the…

  15. The Love Boat: Tiger hopes to salvage marriage by giving Elin a boat?

    Feb 12, 2010, 12:15 PM EDT

    Sorry I cheated, honey. Here’s a $3 million boat. Welcome to The Solitude, a smaller companion boat to Tiger Woods’ luxury yacht Privacy, which is not to be confused with former Senator Gary Hart’s old boat, Monkey Business. The Solitude, a custom dive boat that Woods is having built for wife Elin Nordegren, is just…

  16. This just in: Joe Paterno now looks a little less like that old guy from 'Up'

    Feb 12, 2010, 11:30 AM EDT

    In a move that’s kind of like climbing Mount Rushmore and chiseling the specs off of Teddy Roosevelt, Joe Paterno is ditching his trademark bottle-lensed glasses. At the age of 83 he’s decided on a new look, having undergone eye surgery in January. Now he doesn’t need glasses at all, but will probably wear a…

  17. Fun with Swedish hockey; skate guard fail edition

    Feb 12, 2010, 10:45 AM EDT

    I could be wrong, but this move by Swedish hockey player Kim Karlsson seems to be the equivalent of running onto the football field without your helmet … or your pants. Following the jump, see what happens when you try to dramatically enter a hockey game with your skate guards still on. Amusing reaction from…

  18. Tim Tebow commercial least watched ad of the Super Bowl

    Feb 12, 2010, 10:00 AM EDT

    We already know that Super Bowl XLIV drew in excess of 116 million viewers, making it the most heavily watched TV program in U.S. history (blows party whistle). But who cares about that; now the real numbers are in. Neilsen Research, which sent a guy with a lab coat and clipboard to every home in…

  19. Morning Tweet: Round and round we go

    Feb 12, 2010, 9:00 AM EDT

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    Jesse Spector of course is a baseball writer for the New York Daily News, who is taking some well-earned R&R in Argentina … either that, or he’s hiking the Appalachian Trail (the press release was not clear). But speaking of baseball and things that are glorious, just received an advance copy of the new Willie…

  20. Paper: Tiger Woods thought sex rehab was 'a joke'

    Feb 11, 2010, 7:00 PM EDT

    The National Enquirer, which began this whole Tiger Woods infidelity barn dance back in November (remember when you scoffed at them for daring to report that Woods was having an affair? Ah, we were so innocent then), has today come up with an amusing nugget. Woods did not learn anything during his time at the…