Dec 20, 2012, 11:54 AM EST
Wait, what? We’ll explain that below.
I was beginning to think that the United States’ losing streak in the Miss Universe Pageant would grow to Chicago Cubs proportions — but happily, now it stops just before it gets to Atlanta Braves. Here’s Miss USA, Olivia Culpo, being crowned Miss Universe 2012 by her predecessor, Miss Universe 2011, Leila Lopes on Wednesday. USA! USA! We’re back, baby!
The U.S. hadn’t won a Miss Universe title since 1997. Our long national nightmare is over. I never thought I’d say this, but thank you, Donald Trump.
Culpo is from Cranston, Rhode Island. My favorite parts of this story:
After she was crowned, congratulations flooded Twitter, including from her former Catholic school in East Providence, St. Mary Academy Bay View; Providence Mayor Angel Taveras; even Rhode Island’s most famous seller of its trademark hot wieners, Olneyville New York System.
And of course:
While Culpo will be back in Rhode Island for the holidays, no official appearances as Miss Universe are planned. She said she’s looking forward to seeing one of Providence’s landmarks while she’s home: the giant termite atop a pest control business near downtown.
“I hope the big blue bug will have a little something for me,” she said. “Maybe we need to add a tiara.”
And I love this part, because it’s so American:
No one seemed more surprised than Culpo’s family, who “looked at her like she had three heads” when told them she was entering the Miss Rhode Island contest last year, her father Peter recalled.
“We didn’t know a thing about pageants,” he said.
She won that contest in a rented $20 dress with a hole in it and then began working out, dieting, and studying current events on flashcards to compete for the Miss USA crown.
The exact same way I got this job.
- So long folks, it’s time for me to take off 18
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- None found