Aug 10, 2012, 9:28 AM EST
Check out this photo (linked) of King Carl XVI Gustaf of Sweden, sitting with his wife, Queen Silvia, enjoying an Olympic men’s team handball match between his fiefdom and Denmark and generally looking like some ghastly combination of a J. Crew Seniors catalog and that creepy villain from Ghostbusters 2.
“Hey Denmark! Something is rotten in your state alright, and it is your handball squad! Ya, that’s right!! You all look like a bunch of Dumskalles! And your pastries are terrible!!!”
I’m not sure if he’s rooting on his subjects or preparing to devour my everlasting soul.
Now, a couple things to note here…
Sweden has a King?? I consider myself pretty well-versed in world affairs and I had no idea. Does he have the finest Ikea furniture in all the land? Who’s in his Royal Court, ABBA? And if I told him that The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo is vastly overrated, would I be sent to the gallows or just forced to watch it again? (Please, please let it be the gallows.)
Also, look at the variety of facial expressions going on in that photo! The Queen looks like she just caught a whiff of something ripe, the poor woman in front is doing her best “hear no evil” impression (or maybe just hear no Swedish guttural war cries), and King Gustaf appears to be preparing to disengage his mandible in order to swallow an alligator whole. Somebody give that photographer a bonus, or better yet, the Pulitzer.
Sweden won the match 24-22, clinching the last spot in the quarterfinals, just as King Gustaf clinched a starring role in my nightmares for weeks to come. Snazzy shirts, though.
Never sit in front of the king of Sweden at a handball match [Fourth-Place Medal]
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