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Mascot Power Rankings: Chicago Cubs’ 1908 mascot was horrifying; possibly a giant squirrel

Feb 1, 2012, 2:34 PM EDT

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1. Terrifying Bear-like Creature, Chicago Cubs. Big League Stew brings us this story of how the Chicago Cubs once had a costumed mascot, and how it was certified grade-A nightmare fuel. This “bear” more resembles a deranged muskrat or a mutant nutria, but I imagine it was state of the art for 1908. Also please note that this was the last time the Cubs won a World Series, so perhaps it’s time to bring him back. It won’t do any good to scour the storage rooms at Wrigley however — that park wasn’t built until 1914.

The mascot was also part of the legendary double-play combination of Tinker-to-Evers-to-Chance-to-Moldy Giant Squirrel.

 

 

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source:  2. Grandpa, Ceara FC. SAO PAULO (AP) — A team’s mascot has been suspended for two home matches for making obscene gestures to opposition fans. Ceara’s “Grandpa” mascot was suspended Tuesday after making the gestures to fans from Ferroviario in a match on Sunday. Local media reports that Ceara is also expected to punish the person who was inside the mascot costume. Ceara was relegated from the Brazilian first division last year but is one of the most famous clubs in northeastern Brazil. Or, as we call it in my family, “Thanksgiving dinner.”

 

source:  3. Gapper, Cincinnati Reds. Come on, who hasn’t wanted to punch Gapper at one time or another? Topps rolled out its 2012 baseball card set on Tuesday, and one of the themes was mascots, as we can see with Mike Leake’s card here. I’m assuming there’s also a Mike Leake card without the mascot somewhere in the set.

 

 

source:  4. Big Red Bear, Cornell. The unofficial mascot of Cornell was Tebowing before Tebowing was cool … and this photo from the 2010 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament is proof.

 

 

 

 

source:  5. Dunker, Murray State. A couple of guys named Trubz ‘N’ Matlock composed a rap song to celebrate the Racers’ 22-0 record this season, and the results were … well, judge for yourself (video below). Aiding and abetting this effort was Dunker, the Murray State mascot. Horses have been put down for less.

 

source:  6. Highlander, Howell High School. A high school hockey coach in Howell, Mich., was released for allowing his players to participate in an off-campus ‘fashion show,’ in which some athletes dressed in bras and other lingerie. School administrators were not amused, saying that the incident constituted hazing. This is all somewhat ironic, considering the school’s mascot wears a kilt.

 

source:  7. Mule, Muhlenberg College. The Muhlenberg Mule has taken many forms over the years, but this is my favorite, hands down. His sad-sack, Eeyore vibe is simply perfect for our times. Long live Mule.

 

 

 

source:  8. Sarge, Jackson Generals (Double-A Southern League). Sarge became the Generals’ mascot in 2010, and for some reason was immediately made a three-star general. This despite an obvious record of womanizing on the job. So what is he — a sergeant or a general? I think this team owes us some answers.

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If you have a nomination for the Mascot Power Rankings, contact Rickchand@gmail.com. Twitter: @RickChand.

  1. halflight420 - Feb 2, 2012 at 10:41 AM

    hell yeah muhlenberg lol

  2. startedin67 - Feb 2, 2012 at 7:15 PM

    Oh wow…my wife has just noticed that thing appears to have balls….

  3. AlohaMrHand - Feb 8, 2012 at 2:21 PM

    That’s no mascot,that’s a young Harry Carey!!!