Skip to content

Worst cycling injury ever includes the words ‘hole,’ ‘friction’ and ‘scrotum’

Sep 1, 2011, 12:12 PM EDT

Cycling Tour De France AP

Proving once again that extreme heat, friction, cycling and the groin don’t play well together, a Belgian rider in the Vuelta a Espana (Tour of Spain) suffered a severe injury when his groin burst into flames during Monday’s time trial. Actually, no visible flames — but Tom Boonen had to stand on his pedals during the entire 47-kilometer race, due to “a severe groin injury, caused by friction from his cycling shorts and his saddle.”

Following is possibly the most entertaining and painful three paragraphs in the history of cycling:

“I suffer from an injury to the scrotum,” Boonen said in Het Nieuwsblad, as reported by Cyclingnews.com. “The extreme heat and excessive sweating caused a heavy irritation in that area. There is a hole. It is not the first time that I have suffered in this place, but never as bad as now.”

Boonen said Tuesday’s off day was a welcome break and it allowed team doctor Toon Cruyt to better treat the injured area.

“I got a ‘second skin,’ and glued it at times to a kind of diaper,” Boonen said. “The perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus, is simply the most delicate part of the body.”

If you have to have someone closely inspect your scrotum, his name might as well be Toon Cruyt.

Of course all of this is less horrifying of you imagine it is being said in a speech by Col. Moammar Khadafy, following the latest rebel bombardment:

“The extreme heat and excessive sweating caused a heavy irritation in that area. There is a hole. It is not the first time that I have suffered in this place, but never as bad as now. We will fight to the end. No surrender — let it burn. Thank you.”

To be etched on Khadafy’s tombstone:

The area between the scrotum and the anus is simply the most delicate part of the body — 1942-2011

***
Boonen suffering from severe groin injury at Vuelta a Espana [Universal Sports]

  1. mogogo1 - Sep 1, 2011 at 2:25 PM

    Ouch! Makes you squirm thinking about it. Crazy story. But what’s up with the Khadafy stuff? It’s a Belgian rider in the Tour of Spain…so it ends imagining what a despicable Libyan dictator would say about it? A guy who just said he’d like to see his entire country burn than lose his power? Bad taste.

  2. trbowman - Sep 1, 2011 at 6:30 PM

    I had something somewhat similar to that, it sucks.

  3. marshallnbrown - Sep 1, 2011 at 7:20 PM

    I’ve had similar, though not as serious, problems. S’not fun at all! However, what got me to comment is the puerile, as to say elementary school level, humor based on the doctor’s name. And I also think the Libyan stuff is not only puerile, it is in very bad taste. How ugly an American are you? Whoever rote this should simply grow up… or quit.

    • hamstergram - Sep 1, 2011 at 8:06 PM

      Get lost Miss Manners. Take off the white gloves before you type and maybe you could spell correctly.

  4. goforthanddie - Sep 1, 2011 at 10:01 PM

    I’m sorry, but taint/scrotal injuries=time off from work if you ride a bike professionally.