Jul 14, 2011, 12:26 PM EDT
Jose Canseco’s been pretty crazy lately, let’s just put it that way. One of the greatest things to come out of his latest entry in his attempt at proving the theory of de-evolution to be correct is his twitter feed, which has been littered with his stream of musings on love (Sample tweet: Falling in love sucks), baseball analysts (Sample tweet: John kruck is the man for ESPN he speeks his mind I respect that), begging for a good midwesterner girl (Sample tweet: Would love to meet a nice holesome midwest girl here in chicago. We play tomorrow night at 7 pm in zion if anyone is out there for me) and dealing with strippers (Sample tweet: Advice to the wise don’t fall inlove with woman who take there clothing off for a living). They say a twitter page is kind of a snap shot of a person’s mind, and Canseco’s is apparently rife with misspellings.
But poor Canseco’s lonely. He had a girlfriend named “Leila Shennib”, but then he tried to marry her over twitter, and that’s when things started going sour. As you might imagine. Jose went from being all optimistic with a tweet of, “Leila shennib will you marry me” to a more lonesome, “I actually thought I was going to marry leila .what an idiot I am”, all within a day.
Since his breakup, Canseco’s been typing into his twitter with the crazy mind of a man dealing with heartbreak. Because when you’re sad, the first thing you should do is tell 400,000 people the grim details.
How do you get over heartbreak, you ask? Why by creepin out women by hitting on them through Twitter’s DM, of course! And with the suavest of phrases. “Ur hot baby”. I don’t have the time to use proper spelling, baby. You need to know ur hot. Unfortunately for Canseco, the recipient of the tweet, “@AshleyArizona”, wasn’t exactly smitten by his attempt at a put-on and instead took a screen shot and sent it to all of her followers with the caption, “lmao jose canseco hit on me via DM.” AWK-WARD!
So let’s just sit back and watch the rest of Jose’s Twitter soap opera head further into the ditch. Shine on, you crazy diamond.
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