Week In Review: Vancouver rioters, prepare to face the terrible wrath of Michael Bublé!

Michael Bublé’s first dream, before making the world drowsy with elevator music, was to be a professional hockey player. Specifically for the Canucks. That’s why he was so enraged at the Vancouver riots, in which various hoseheads looted, burned, assaulted and hungered for braaaaiiiins. Many have been brought to justice, but Bublé, just named the fifth-richest musician in the world by Forbes, is leading an ad campaign effort to capture even more of the miscreants. How mad is he at the rioters? From the Toronto Globe and Mail:

“They’re trash, basically. It was gutless and disgusting behaviour. And I’m grateful for the police and firemen and paramedics who put their lives on the line, because there were people who were so scared. And that mob mentality could have killed somebody.”

Bublé attended Game 7, but left before the rioting got into full swing. However, his mother and other relatives were among the crowd trapped in the Queen Elizabeth Theater during the musical Wicked. The horrible details:

By show’s end, they found themselves unable to leave because outside cars were burning and men were brawling. Inside the theatre, Mr. Bublé says his mother, grandmother and little niece and nephew were terrified.

Disrupting the musical theater? Those rioting bastards!

But there were other stories this week, believe it or not. Let’s click our heels together three times, and take a look.

• Simona Halep’s breast reduction has ruined tennis saved her career.

• If you’re not doing anything tonight, this suggestive U.S. Army wrestling trophy is free.

• Erin Andrews owns kid over peephole video remark.

• RIP, Sports Show with Norm Macdonald.

• Then one day, Deisel Dean Daigel met Fred and Fanny Farkel, and everybody’s heads exploded.

• Miss California knows a lot about pot.

• County officials try to shut down kids’ lemonade stand at U.S. Open, get publicity beatdown.

That’s it for this week. Rob Sylvester and his army of flying monkeys will take you through the weekend, and everyone will have pie.

So, can we do it all again beginning on Monday?