Sepp Blatter invites Placido Domingo, Henry Kissinger to join new FIFA ‘Council of Wisdom’

Yes, FIFA politics currently resembles an Italian opera, but we never expected the analogy to be carried this far. Sepp Blatter, stung by charges of corruption in his soccer fiefdom, has followed up on his recent pledge to clean up the game in the most bizarre way possible. The Fifa chief announced on Monday that he has appointed a “Council of Wisdom”, and among the members will be Spanish tenor Placido Domingo, Henry Kissinger and former FBI chief Louis Freeh. Their task? Root out Fifa corruption.

Speaking in an interview with CNN on Monday, Blatter initially forgot Domingo’s name, but, when pressed, confirmed that a man who has filled the world’s great opera houses would be turning his attention to stemming the tide of corruption engulfing Fifa.

“These gentlemen are more or less advisers, they are not the experts but advisers and what they should be also is the kind of council of wisdom which my executive committee would not like because they think they are the council of wisdom,” Blatter said.

A hundred bucks says that Blatter also wanted Zorro until someone pointed out he was a fictional character.

News of Blatter’s new council has been received in the online community as one might expect.

• Just when you think FIFA couldn’t get any more ludicrous – the ‘how many tenors does it take to bribe Blatter’ puns are writing themselves. Apparently Peter O’Toole, Nana Mouskouri and the dog from the Littlest Hobo are also all on standby should there be any last-minute drop-outs. — Who Ate All The Pies.

• Blatter simply wants to trot out some of the famous people he has met over the years to prove that he truly is a power player. It feeds the insatiable appetite that is his ego and the only reason he doesn’t call on Nelson Mandela is because FIFA has already effed South Africa and Mandela would probably shank Blatter in the kidney. — Unprofessional Foul.

• So FIFA is going about cleaning up the game with a panel of “wise men”. They began with Johan Cruyff, which is all good and well. Then it went down hill. They then added Henry Kissinger, who is, in fact, actually dead. And Placido Domingo, whose overwhelming qualifications begin and end with the fact that he performs well in trios. — The Offside

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Fifa president Sepp Blatter invites Placido Domingo to help root out corruption [Telegraph uk]