Headline of the day so far: ‘Man attacks woman with pool noodle in watermelon dispute’
May 24, 2011, 3:47 PM EDT
In addition to this marvelous headline, this story from the Naples News also includes one of the most unique paragraphs I’ve ever seen in journalism. Enjoy.
Eichner approached the woman with his swim noodle full of water and dumped the water on her as she was sitting on her towel. He then punched her in the cheek.
We’re talking about Karl Ludwig Eichner, 68, of East Naples, Fla., who on Sunday demonstrated that you can only push a man so far. He apparently spent all day at the beach shaping a watermelon into the shape of a human head, and left it out for the masses to admire. But when a woman came along and saw the abandoned fruit sculpture sitting in the sand, she placed it in the surf so that it wouldn’t attract bugs. Eichner returned, and was not pleased. Melon-related mayhem ensued.
Least surprising part: In the police report, under “occupation” for Eichner, it says “unknown.”
How to use your pool noodle:
Correct:
Incorrect:
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Man accused of attacking woman with swim noodle over watermelon dispute at Lowdermilk Park [Naples News]
