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New sport alert: Bo-Taoshi makes sense to the Japanese, and that’s all that counts (video)

May 18, 2011, 11:34 AM EDT

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Because you never know when another country will invade and ruthlessly try to topple your telephone poles, the Japanese military has invented a sport called Bo-Taoshi for its cadets. The rules are simple: There are 150 men on each team. Seventy-five men defend their team’s pole, while the other 75 try to pull down the opponents pole. This is done by any means necessary, and as you can see below, the mayhem is brutal, and of course stupid. A winning strategy usually involves running up the backs of your teammates, it seems, and launching yourself at the enemy pole. (Porn soundtrack here).

It’s a wacky version of capture-the-flag, actually. Don’t laugh. With the NFL lockout, ESPN will be televising this by October. Here’s another assault:

I’m having flashbacks: this is exactly what it was like on Free Taco Day at my high school.

New Sport: Bo-Taoshi [Deuce of Davenport]