Dec 22, 2010, 9:00 AM EDT
“Um, why isn’t this thing moving? Oh, it is? Wheeeee!” You’ve probably thought of a much funnier caption by now. Also, dear, I’m no racing expert, but I believe you’re supposed to hold the handle bars. Anyhow, as you may know, Paris Hilton bought into Sergio Gadea and Maverick Viñales’ Moto 125cc grand prix team a while back, and with that comes certain privileges, I guess. Like this custom bike, and a photo op. Hey, vampires need blood to survive; Hilton needs the photo op. According to Deuce of Davenport, she “intends to make as many races as possible.” Which means, thankfully, none.
ABOUT LAST NIGHT
What you missed while assembling your crack government WTF team …
- A War on Christmas? If these videos didn’t kill it, nothing will.
- Detroit Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh shows off his Michael Jackson dance moves to kids at Children’s Hospital in Detroit. Who’s bad?
- A 14-year-old girl bumps into your child on the ski slope? Why not punch her in the face?
TODAY IN MARK TRAIL …
Damn Al Qaeda … now they’re using talking pelicans.
- So long folks, it’s time for me to take off 18
- Man wins full marathon while pushing his daughter in a baby stroller (video) 14
- Lock and load, it’s youth baseball fundraising time: league raffling off AR-15 rifle (video) 8
- Sim Bhullar is a large basketball player, and I mean it. Anybody want a peanut? 0
- What’s with kids and all these death-defying stunts? 674
- Nothing to see here…just a 70-yard field goal by a high-schooler (video) 3
- None found