“Um, why isn’t this thing moving? Oh, it is? Wheeeee!” You’ve probably thought of a much funnier caption by now. Also, dear, I’m no racing expert, but I believe you’re supposed to hold the handle bars. Anyhow, as you may know, Paris Hilton bought into Sergio Gadea and Maverick Viñales’ Moto 125cc grand prix team a while back, and with that comes certain privileges, I guess. Like this custom bike, and a photo op. Hey, vampires need blood to survive; Hilton needs the photo op. According to Deuce of Davenport, she “intends to make as many races as possible.” Which means, thankfully, none.
***
ABOUT LAST NIGHT
What you missed while assembling your crack government WTF team …
- A War on Christmas? If these videos didn’t kill it, nothing will.
- Detroit Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh shows off his Michael Jackson dance moves to kids at Children’s Hospital in Detroit. Who’s bad?
- A 14-year-old girl bumps into your child on the ski slope? Why not punch her in the face?
***
TODAY IN MARK TRAIL …
Damn Al Qaeda … now they’re using talking pelicans.
