If there’s one thing I know about the Summer Olympics, it’s that hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid. And to prove my point, this just in from London: Laser guns will replace air pistols in the modern pentathlon at the 2012 Olympics. Finally your endless hours at the Laser Tag Emporium pay off. From the London Telegraph:
The new technology will reduce the cost of shooting by two thirds in the sport and the improved safety of the event could mean new venues are used.
“We will have laser shooting for the 2012 Olympics. Based on this new technology, all countries in the world can compete in our sport,” Union Internationale de Pentathlon Moderne (UIPM) President Klaus Schormann said.
“We can hold competitions in parks and even shopping malls. Safety issues will no longer be a big concern.”
Forgive me if I’m not excited about having an Olympic medal stand in front of Bath & Body Works.
But look, the Prince of Monaco evidently signed off on it, so cease your email protest campaign. You can’t argue with a prince.
The new laser system has received royal approval with Prince Albert of Monaco, also honorary president of UIPM, pointing out the practical benefits of the change.
“They (the laser guns) will also be easier to carry around, and to take on aeroplanes. It’s the way of the future.”
Why do I get the feeling that Prince Albert believes we’re talking about real guns being replaced with laser weapons?
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London 2012 Olympics: laser guns to be used over air pistols for modern pentathlon [Daily Telegraph]
Pentathlon switches to laser guns for London 2012 Games [BBC Sport]
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- Norm - Aug 26, 2010 at 8:56 PM
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When was the last time there was a safety issur in Olympic Pentathlon or even regular air pistol/rifle competition?
More politically correct BS.
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- greg - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:00 PM
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They better replace the horses with wooden ones. Safer, and easier to transport. Its for the children. Better yet, just make the event a video game.
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- Stephen - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:04 PM
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That makes no sense at all. So now Olympic level competitions will get to completely ignore weather and other local conditions that make such a difference from event to event? My two year old brother could take a light gun and hit a bullseye consistently. The entire point of a shooting competition is the way in which you negotiate the variables that can effect a pellet/bullet’s trajectory. Making it a laser negates all that and means people are gonna be getting medals for playing Duck Hunt.
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- Brian - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:05 PM
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So I guess they’re taking windage and humidity out of the equation. Along with differences in guns and ammo. Laser Guns take all the skill out of a skill sport. It will be just like taking a picture with a digital camera, “Just Point and Shoot”! Bullseye every time!
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- Nelson Robison - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:07 PM
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Not only is this the biggest crock of bull, but worse yet it is an assault on the owning of guns and weapons which has been a hallmark of the Olympics since time immemorial.
We need to protest this obviously politically correct decision.
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- david - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:11 PM
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This is ridiculous. The aspects of shooting accurately require being able to keep the barrel drift in check, which can be done with any pointing object like a laser gun, but the rest of it dealing with aerodynamics, trajectory, the drift from the breeze, fall from gravity etc, to get the projectile to the intended point on the target. With a laser, all of that is removed. Whats the point in that.
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- Wankerdoodle - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:16 PM
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I hear that the WII system will be introduced for both tennis and snowboarding in a few years as well. As soon as they can test for HGH for it via the internet.
I’m expecting that the day of the lean mean olympic athlete is over. The day of the black t-shirt wearing, mountain dew drinking and bag of Doritos athlete is HERE!
I’m gonna send my next e-mail to Chester Cheeto and seek sponsorship immediately.
UGH……………………………………….
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- Clark Nova - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:31 PM
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This is idiotic. With a laser gun there is no correction needed for either windage or distance and no knowledge of ballistics is required. This removes most of the challenge. They should be going back to real firearms instead of infantilizing the event.
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- jeff sutter - Aug 26, 2010 at 9:40 PM
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This s something Billy Payne would love along with Izzi. LOL
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- Jay - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:06 PM
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I think the bigger issue is how relevant is this sport these days? Does it make sense to keep this event?
We see the number of Olympic sports growing with the introduction or inclusion of more and more sports and events. The Olympics just keep getting bigger, perhaps it is time to consider removing some archaic sports to make the Games more relevant.
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- Pat - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:13 PM
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Pitiful…
To retain some of the challenge, we’ll blindfold them and spin them around 3 times.
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- jrod - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:36 PM
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unless, of course, you count the interference from solar flairs or the refraction from rain drops… they should have these guys shoot from like 40 or 50 kilometers way from their intended target, perhaps with some sort of mirror scheme? either that or we could just resort to watching Halo on BBC in two years time…
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- cbr - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:38 PM
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next it will be john madden football at the superbowl. I’m done. I shot competively for years in the shotgun disaplines.. what next a handful of bird seed and lets she how may we can attract. this is nuts! and the end of all shooting disaplines in the olympics.
Unbelivable!!!
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- yasgur - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:38 PM
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The demo sport for the 2014 winter games is rumored to be Dance Dance Revolution.
@Jay Some of the more archaic sports are sprints, long distance running, jumping, javelin…they are all events that tested the skills and endurance that ancient warriors needed to survive.
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- cowboyconservative1960 - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:41 PM
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ROFLMFAO!!! Wii?? OMG! 2 Funny!
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- Sean O - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:54 PM
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The NRA-ers on this thread crack me up. Quick, without looking it up tell me the name or country of the 2008 gold medalist in the Olympic Pentathlon…. How about the five events that make up the Olympic Pentathlon…. Nope. Didn’t think so. In other words: Who cares?
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- JG - Aug 26, 2010 at 10:55 PM
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As an English borm US citizen this is truely one of he most embarrasing moments of my life.
The nanny state is really upon us.
“You’re not grown up enough to have the big bad guns that go bang.”
Please, please, please will politicians keep the hell out of sports.
(For those that don’t remember you do have armed police that are regularly required to intervene in life threatenuing incdents! And they do quite rightly KILL people!!)
PENTATHLON HAS A SHOOTING ELEMENT. LIFE HAS A SHOOTING ELEMENT, EVEN IN THE BRITISH INSULAR ISLES.
IT IS NOT THE BRITISH GOVERNMENT, THROUGH THE GB OLYMPIC COMMITEE’S, POSITION TO ALTER LONG EWSTABLISHED SPORTING EVENTS TO MEET THE SUPPOSED PC RULES OF AN INDIVIDUAL NATION.
IF YOU DIDN’T FEEL ABLE TO HOST THE EVENTS OF THE OLYMPIAD, EITHER MORALLY OR LEGALY, WHY DID YOU BID TO BE HOST NATION.
Disgusted of Los Angeles.
P.S. please excuse grammar and spelling…. emotions were running high!!
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- Axel - Aug 26, 2010 at 11:06 PM
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What, are they going to cancel archery next or maybe replace it with Wii Sports Archery ? What about the Winter Games, is the only good event, Biathlon, going to be done with snowballs instead of air rifles ????
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- Steve - Aug 26, 2010 at 11:26 PM
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“Dad, can I have a laser pistol for Christmas’? “Don’t be silly, Nigel. You’ll only lase your eye out with it”.
I also doubt the notion that laser guns will be permitted to be easily carried on “Aeroplanes”.
Whatever. You all switch to laser pistols and rifles, and we’ll keep learning sight picture, sight alignment, natural point of aim, breath control, trigger control, windage, elevation, and minutes of angle. And then when you Euroheathens come for our pellet guns, we’ll shoot your eyes out.
From our cold, dead hands, Euroheathens. Cold dead hands. After we’ve all died laughing at the next ridiculous idea you come up with, like kick-boxing in giant stuffed sumo wrestler suits.
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- proamerica - Aug 26, 2010 at 11:28 PM
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The ‘NERF’ shotput and spaghetti javelin contests will be extremely safe and can be performen in a classroom.
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- Eatenhogg - Aug 26, 2010 at 11:44 PM
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That’s not true. Heavy snow and fog will certainly have an effect. I imagine severe sand storms will as well. Hurricanes, tornadoes. I don’t really see an issue here.
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- georgezilla - Aug 26, 2010 at 11:47 PM
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Once again we hear from the people who have no clue what they are talking about.
Who was it that said …
It is better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you are stupid. Then it is to open your mouth and prove to them that you are.
And then you/they take it to the extreme and get to “‘NERF’ shotput”.
You people are just to damned funny. To damned funny. And pathetic.
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- Tim - Aug 27, 2010 at 12:29 AM
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Wow… this is really pathetic. Laser guns? Seriously?
How incredibly frickin’ sad.
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- Rohn Hazard - Aug 27, 2010 at 12:33 AM
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In fairness to the laser gun, light always travels in a straight line. Slight variations in aim can make a difference. What the change to laser does to the sport is the elimination of environmental factors like wind and ambient air pressure. The need for skill is still there, although the required level of skill is arguably diminished. I hope they tested it first and check the difference in the results.
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- TChristian - Aug 27, 2010 at 1:38 AM
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Just took the sport out of it, the whole point in shooting is to have to deal with all the things that make a projectile so fundamentally different than a straight laser beam. Why dont we just score them on their ability to point in a direction accurately? Thats all this laser gun idea amounts to; who can point the best instead of who can accomodate the myriad of environmental factors the best and still point accurately. Ridiculous and another blow to olympic credibility. What next, balance beams that are painted on the floor instead of acutal beams so gymnasts dont get hurt? Lets see how well Phelps can float, instead of all that messy swimming business…. This is nuts.
