Dutch soccer team never expected to get this far; is now homeless

The Dutch accounting team probably should have invested in a little optimism when they were figuring out how long they should book hotel rooms for their footie heroes. Instead they went by the old Mickey Mantle adage, “If I knew I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.” And now they’re just a mangy bunch of dudes with funky accents who can’t find a home. If you’re looking to take in a large group of fellows with cardiovascular abilities that’ll make you feel like Grimace from those old McDonald’s cartoons, you are in luck.

FIFA is hunting for a hotel for the Netherlands World Cup squad after the modest Dutch failed to book rooms so deep in the tournament. The Dutch Football Association (KNVB) only made reservations in Johannesburg’s Sandton Hilton hotel up until July 5 — and their home from home is now fully booked.

While world soccer’s governing body FIFA accommodates all teams the night before and after a match, teams must make their own arrangements for the other nights.

Netherlands take on Uruguay later on Tuesday in Cape Town in the first semi-final and, if successful, will look to return to Johannesburg.

I can only imagine the entire Holland soccer squad staring in bemusement as bellhops are loading all of their luggage onto the corner of a busy Cape Town street. “Vere vill ve live now, coach!?” one will quietly ask (I’m not really sure how the Dutch talk and a Google search of “What do the Dutch speak like?” resulted in information about talking like a pirate). As their leader Bert van Marwijk solemnly points to a fleet of nearby dumpsters.
The good news? There’s a chance the new Holland digs will involve BUNK BEDS! Now excuse me as I imagine about how much better my childhood would have been if there had been double-decker beds involved.
***
Modest Dutch ‘homeless’ after semi-final [Yahoo News]