So you’re hanging out in the bleachers at a minor league baseball game, and you feel like a beer. Why go the long way through the stands to the concession area? Pictured to right is roughly the route taken by one man at Blair County Ballpark to get from point A to point B. Never mind that it was the middle of the ninth inning, and they had to stop the game until he was off the field.
It all happened at the home field of the Altoona Curve, an Eastern League, Double-A squad based in Altoona, Pa. And there’s no truth to the rumor that the man was Arlen Specter.
From the Altoona Mirror:
Tyrone R. Squires, 24, was described by police as being homeless and originally from Massachusetts but with no permanent address. Sporting a thick, dark beard and wearing an old-time military hat, Squires kept his hands in his pockets as he strolled at a very slow pace from left to right along the outfield wall on the warning track.
Ballpark security allowed him to keep walking until he exited the field near the Curve bullpen down the right field line, where officials detained him. About 20 minutes later, Logan Township police arrived on scene to make an arrest.
“We will prosecute to the full extent of the law,” Curve senior adviser Sal Baglieri said. “That can’t happen again.”
Wow, harsh. I hope dude at least got his funnel cake.
UPDATE: Police say Tyrone Squires was hopped up on vodka, was “drunk and stupid and was a goof.”
The week’s minor league promotional highlights, and other stuff, following the jump.
* Livin’ La Vida Lunch Meat. Tonight, Altoona Curve (Eastern League). Yep, it’s the above-mentioned Curve again, and you can still make it if you hurry. Festivities includes a “Meat-Eaters Derby,” greased pig competition, and the “Canadian Bacon vs. Ham jousting battle.’ Plus, Adam Sandler’s immortal Lunch Lady Land will be played.
* Bark in the Park Night with bomb-sniffing dogs. Tonight, Richmond Flying Squirrels (Eastern League). The Richmond K9 unit will attempt to locate the high explosives that are stashed under the seat of one lucky fan.
* Tiger Woods Night. Thursday, Hickory Crawdads (South Atlantic League). Festivities will include dizzy golf club races, Wiffle ball driving competitions and a trivia contest. Plus, anyone with the last name of Woods is admitted free. Bring a date … and your wife. [Thanks to Benjamin Hill].
* Empire Strikes Back 30th Anniversary Celebration. Friday, Fort Myers Miracle (Florida State League). “In honor of Han Solo being trapped in carbonite, the Miracle will freeze several items in dry ice.” Get your tickets now.
* Ceremonial First Pitch of the Week. Tyrannosaurus Rex throws out first pitch, Memphis Redbirds (Pacific Coast League). All that’s missing is Dennis Nedry crashing his Jeep into a tree. [Thanks to Sportress of Blogitude]
* Bobblehead of the Moment. Lewis and Clark Bobblehead Night. Saturday, Portland Beavers (Pacific Coast League). Portland was the end of the line for the famed explorers, who walked across a continent in the name of science (and you complain about taking out the trash).
* Mascot of the Week. Burrito, Grand Prairie Airhogs (Independent American Association). So a burrito, a hot dog and an Italian Sausage walk into a restroom … [Thanks to Lew Patton]
* Players of the Week. Loek Van Mil, Chris Cates, New Britain Rock Cats (Eastern League). The Rock Cats called up Van Mil, who at 7-foot-1 is the tallest player in pro baseball, according to the team. And to satisfy their sense of proportion, they also called up the 5-foot-3 Cates, whom they say is pro baseball’s smallest player. The two will spend the remainder of the season having their picture taken together. [Thanks to NBC Connecticut]
