When most people think of all the technological advancements that make our lives that much easier to live, they think of the mulleted, jort-wearing hick, Jared Allen.
Much like the Chad Ochocinco app that preceded it, the Jared Allen app for the iPhone is chock-full of interesting little features that are as unique and off-the-wall as the character for which it is named. And best of all, courtesy of creator Rock Software, both apps are as free as the spirits of their namesakes.
After taking a look at both side by side on my trust laptop, the homer in me favors the new Jared Allen app over Ochocinco’s, but I do not own an iPhone (here’s the model of cellular technology I am currently using), so I didn’t actually perform a firsthand analysis. Thankfully, FirstCuts did a little investigating of their own and wrote a little review.
After the jump, we’ll take a look at the down-home, animal-huntin’, flag-wavin’ apps. Don’t fear the mullet, people, embrace it!
Via iTunes:
• History of all American flags. There’s been more than one flag, so be a real American and learn all of them.
Lee Greenwood would be proud. He’d also like to know if you are going to finish your sandwich there.
• Mullet Generator – if you’re not cool enough to have a real one, add one to your own pic and send it off to all your friends. You’ll get the idea of how cool you can really look.
Thanks, Jared Allen and Rock Software. For many men out there, male pattern baldness is not only a reason we laugh at them behind their backs, it’s a way of life.
• Pictures of me hunting and playing football (body slamming quarterbacks).
It’s good he doesn’t get these two activities confused.
• Pictures of the mullet mullitia – if you have a sweet picture of yourself rocking a mullet – email it to jared@rocksoftware.com and if it’s cool enough – I’ll make sure to put it on the app.
The mullet mullitia: not as heavily-armed or as dangerous as real militias, but they are worse-dressed and not as well-versed in the nuances of the English language.
• Ask me questions and I’ll try to get back to you – just make sure they aren’t dumb.
There is no such thing as a dumb question, is there? Or is that a dumb question? Huh.
• Twitter app to use to tweet. I don’t know what this means but Rock Software said it would cool. I don’t use tweeter yet.
Tweeter? I hardly know her!
• The Lodge info – check out my restaurant when you’re in Arizona. The Bleu Cheese & Bacon burger is the BOMB!!
Word up, my homey.
• Check out my favorite songs and apps. Real music right there.
Here’s a hunch: lots of Foghat.
• Tips for you amateur hunters.
For some reason, this frightens me.
• Sound bites that you can ONLY use to crank call or if you’re at the library.
I have been told that Jared Allen “don’t use” a “libary” yet either.
• I got some other stuff on here too for you to check out, including videos and our football schedule w/ scores and all that stuff.
So there you have it. Even if you are not a Jared Allen fan or even a football fan, this app has oodles of fun stuff you can try out for yourself. Plus it’s as free as bird now, and this bird you cannot change.
Methinks Jared would appreciate the Skynyrd reference.
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Review: Jared Allen iPhone App [FirstCuts]
