Hell hath no fury like a Kenyon Martin pranked

Allow me to introduce you to the latest installment of “When April Fool’s Pranks Go Horribly, Horribly Wrong.”
On Thursday evening while the Denver Nuggets were taking on the Portland Trail Blazers at the Pepsi Center, Laquan Johnson, a former Nuggets ball boy and presently the driver for Denver guard J.R. Smith, sneaked into the Nuggets’ locker room, swiped apparently humor-challenged Kenyon Martin’s keys and proceeded to fill up the player’s car with buttered popcorn.
To say that Martin didn’t take too kindly to the prank would be a drastic understatement. In fact, the sometimes erratically-behaving forward straight up flipped out.

Upon discovering that his automobile was filled with buttery Orville Redenbacher goodness, an enraged Martin, not knowing who committed the trickery, stormed back into the locker room and had a full-blown meltdown.
Via ESPN:

“That ain’t no [expletive] joke,” Martin said. “I’m going to find out who did it … put my [expletive] hands on one of y’all. I’m going to put my hands on whoever did it. You better believe that. It’s [expletive] personal. You better believe it.

“How ’bout if I don’t play in the playoffs until somebody tells me who did it,” Martin said more than once.

Overreact much? Granted, I wouldn’t be too pleased to find my car filled with popcorn, but unlike Martin, I only own one car, not a fleet. Further, it was a joke, although a misguided joke, sometimes you have to roll with it a little bit.
Ultimately, once Martin found out it was Johnson and the former ball boy apologized and offered to pay to repair the damages, cooler heads prevailed.

“It was just an April Fools joke that went horribly wrong,” said a member of the Nuggets organization who spoke on the condition of anonymity. “The kid thought it would be funny and it wasn’t. Kenyon was back at practice today and everything was fine between him and his teammates.”

Despite Johnson fessing up, I suspect there had to be a puppetmaster behind it all, anonymously pulling the strings for his own devilish delight.
Has anybody checked into whether this Johnson fellow is on Mark Cuban’s payroll? The truth is out there, folks, you just have to be paranoid and delusional enough to look for it.
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Martin upset about popcorn prank [ESPN]
Mark Cuban Had A Mother’s Day Gift For Kenyon Martin’s Mom [Deadspin]