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Polar Bear Payback restores nature's delicate balance

Mar 16, 2010, 11:00 AM EDT

I would imagine that this is every Canadian’s nightmare … I mean besides the Always Enjoyable Giant Inflatable Beavers. From the folks at Adult Swim, via The Peta Files, comes the new game Polar Bear Payback, in which you control a bloodthirsty polar bear as he battles through hordes of seal slaughterers (level 1 of the game) and whalers (level 2), all while saving animals and the environment. It’s kind of The Golden Compass on crack, with the added bonus of being able to insult Canadians. In other words, fun for the entire family.

From The Peta Files:

And bloodthirsty is right. To keep your health meter high, you must bite the heads off the animal abusers and suck the blood from their skulls. After you spit out the skull, one of your baby-seal companions will use his head to toss it like a rubber ball. No, this game is not for the faint of heart.

Or, as it says in the game’s instructions:

Claw and chomp your way from the Arctic Shore to the streets of New York exacting revenge upon those who have pillaged your once-peaceful frozen wonderland.

Sure to be a popular item, I’m sure, with Sarah Palin enthusiasts and members of the Canadian Parliament. Peta went all out in protesting Canada’s annual harp seal slaughter (going on right now) during the Winter Olympics, and even followed the Olympic Torch across Canada with a giant inflatable protest seal. A computer game in which one gets to slaughter the seal slaughterers fills them with delight, I have no doubt.
Polar Bear Payback was developed by Smashing Ideas, which has also given us Robot Unicorn Attack and, my favorite, Dungeons & Dungeons.
Polar Bear Payback [Adult Swim]
Polar Bear Payback: Slaughtering the seal slaughterers [The Peta Files]

  1. Tiffany - Mar 18, 2010 at 10:36 PM

    Thank you for crediting Smashing Ideas with Robot Unicorn Attack and Dungeons & Dragons, but those are both games by other developers. We did create this game and also Schizophrenzy though. Go polar bears! Woohoo!

  2. Rick Chandler - Mar 18, 2010 at 10:39 PM

    Thanks for pointing that out … will fix. Polar Bear Payback rules, and it rules hard.