Brewers want you to give your girlfriend the kielbasa on Valentine's Day

If you’re looking for that special gift for your sweetie on Valentine’s Day, and live within a 45-mile radius of Milwaukee’s Miller Park, this is your big opportunity. Bidding is still open for the love gesture of all love gestures: to have the Milwaukee Brewers’ Racing Sausages serenade your loved one at the place of your choosing. The metaphors, subliminal messages and just plain weirdness of this would keep a roomful of sex therapists busy for a week. And it will only cost you (so far) $300. But only six days left to make your bid, so hurry.
Nothing says love like a tender sonnet from the giant chorizo.

Please note: According to the post at the Brewers web site, “Shipping charges will be added.”
From The Brewers Bar:

The package also includes tickets to a Brewers/Pirates game in April and a sappy scoreboard message that will be displayed during the game. It’ll set you back a few benjamins, though — the opening bid is $300. Ninety percent of the proceeds from the auction are going to charity, though, so it is for a good cause.

One thing I did get a kick out of, though, were the disclaimers at the bottom, particularly the Conditions of Sale: “Items are sold in ‘as-is’ condition.”

So remember, if your sausages show up bruised and bandaged, you can’t get your money back.

Caution: Giving your wife tickets to a Pirates game as a Valentine’s Day present has led to more than one divorce.
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Nothing says Valentine’s like sausage [The Brewers Bar (via)]
Sausages serenade your sweetheart [Brewers.com]