“Feast your eyes, glut your soul, on my accursed ugliness!”
For once, I am not referring to myself when I say that – you wouldn’t believe the odd looks I get when I say it at White Castle – I am referencing the bizarre story of a troubled man who haunts the upper recesses of Joe Louis Arena and had to be removed from the rafters Saturday night during the Red Wings-Los Angeles Kings game.
By the way, the line is a reference from The Phantom of the Opera, people. It was a movie (and novel, and opera, off all things) starring Lon Chaney. He was kind of the weird-looking-dude-from-Twilight-or-whatever-you crazy-kids-are-watching-these-days of his era.
After the Phantom was discovered, in the interest of safety, security evacuated a section of the lower bowl. Fans were allowed to return to the seats after the tortured soul was apprehended and removed from the arena, but if he has his way, the Phantom will one day return and inhabit his safe haven – the only place where he feels safe – away from the prying eyes of those who will never understand him.
Players on both teams were equally spooked by the puck-loving phantasm.
“We didn’t know what was going on until somebody pointed it out,” Red Wings captain Nicklas Lidstrom said.
“I don’t know what the guy was trying to do or anything,” Los Angeles forward Anze Kopitar said. “It’s the first time I’ve seen that.”
Perhaps that was the first time anyone has seen the Phantom of Joe Louis Arena. But I suspect he has always been there. Watching in a twisted sense of melancholy rage, observing a world he envies yet despises.
I don’t know, maybe he’s just a helpless man obsessed with the capricious casting of cephalopods and Al the Octopus, but rarely are situations like this so easy to explain. I’d prefer to imagine him saying, “If I am the Phantom, it is because man’s hatred has made me so. If I shall be saved, it will be because your love redeems me” as he was carried away by authorities. But I’m kind of weirdo, so there you go.
***
Man removed from rafters during Red Wings game [SI/AP]
Fan on catwalk causes ruckus at the Joe [Detroit Free Press]
