Archives › 2009 › November

So if Stephen Colbert and his Colbert Report viewers are sponsoring the U.S. Olympic speed skating team for the 2010 Winter Olympics, why are Shani Davis and Apolo Anton Ohno, the team’s leading long and short track skaters, refusing to wear the Colbert Nation logo on their warmup gear? I see, Ohno; you’ll debase yourself…

Fox Sports’ Jay Glazer is back from his trip to Afghanistan, and has some interesting photos. In addition to teaching some MMA moves to the troops, here’s a twitpic of a message he scrawled on a bomb. The Jake he refers to is a good friend he lost in the New York attacks on 9/11.…

Michigan AD Bill Martin, aka Pushy McPusherson, is not to be trifled with by the help. AP reports today that on two separate occasions during Michigan football games this season, Martin got slightly physical with press box attendants who didn’t recognize him and asked to see a pass. He pushed the shoulder of one, a…

I haven’t picked up Bill Simmons’ new book, The Book of Basketball, but I hear that it’s quite the page-turner (No. 1 New York Times bestseller). His book signing tour has been quite eventful as well. Excerpt: “In Philly, I met the legendary NBA statistician Harvey Pollack, one of the few remaining people who witnessed…

Maybe I’m late to the party with this, but from the very top row of the stadium on Saturday, it looked as if the Stanford Band had landed a very buxom drum majorette. On closer inspection, however, the truth was revealed. Oh well … back to the game. Stanford 51, Oregon 42; thanks in no…

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s that you can’t buy much for a dollar; it’s embarrassing to try and “make it rain” with a small handful of loose change. So what was Chad Ochocinco thinking on Sunday when he tried to bribe a referee with a single? Here’s the Twitpic referred to…

As we know from reading the Bible — or Jesus Christ’s Wikipedia page, for those born after 1985 — Jesus turned water to wine, and taught us to love our enemies. He also foretold of Ted Ginn Jr., predicting his many miracles with the Miami Dolphins. And lo, it came to pass vs. the Jets,…

Of course … how could we have been so blind!? We’ve been spinning our wheels for eight years trying to bring this guy to justice, and the answer’s been right there the entire time. Sick PETA on him. No way you escape enraged animal activists, Osama. Start saying your goodbyes. And speaking of people who…

It’s only appropriate that a social networking device first revealed the news of the social networking of Maria Sharapova and the Lakers’ Sasha Vujacic. They’re romantically involved, says Darren Rovell of CNBC, who Twittered the news to a breathless nation recently. My question: What kind of a super athlete would a coupling of these two…

How to know when you’re unpopular: When the surgeon general offers you a cigarette. Another clue: When fans of your NFL team circulate a petition to stop you from playing. That’s gotta be a confidence booster for Larry Johnson, the subject of a petition by Chiefs fans who don’t want him breaking Priest Holmes’ career…

Your New York Yankees are world champions of stick and ball. So I guess the person I feel most sorry for, besides Cole Hamels, was the guy who was presented Series tickets by David Letterman during Tuesday’s taping of The Late Show. Problem: They were tickets for Game 7. Oh well. Some things are not…

When I heard that Chicago Bears linebacker Lance Briggs had launched his own comic book site a while back, I was rather stunned. I mean, it may be the first time that someone involved in a paternity suit has had an opinion on The X-Men. Briggs started the site Lance’s Comic World in September, giving…

No Nick, and frankly I’m surprised that a Packer doesn’t know how to make his own. Whenever I have a meat-related question, I consult AskTheMeatman.com, which I have bookmarked. Please don’t be alarmed by their logo, which appears to be a penguin shoving meat into a grinder. That’s actually somewhat troubling when I think about…

Hmm, a busload of Phillies fans in the parking lot at Yankee Stadium. Copious alcohol consumption. What could possibly go wrong? Parking lot brawls are always so much fun. My favorite part of the video below — aside from the people calmly filing into the bus as if nothing is happening — is the two…

I have to admit that when Stephen Colbert broke away from The Daily Show to host The Colbert Report, I didn’t give it much of a chance. It was a huge leap to believe that audiences would respond to Colbert’s daily roleplaying of a faux blowhard conservative. Too much irony for the modern viewer, IMO.…

On Monday we recounted the harrowing battle between Manu Ginobili and a bat, with the Spurs’ big man the apparent winner by TKO in the first round. But in a stunning reversal, it’s now the bat who is claiming victory (tiny mammal victory dance here). Ginobili, it is revealed, will have to undergo a month-long…

If you can’t watch your favorite team win, then almost as sweet is watching your least favorite team lose. Can the Yankees blow a three-games-to-two lead as the World Series heads back to the Bronx? Stranger things have happened. So, Tuesday … we meet again. Please proceed with your second-day-of-the-week-ishness. More shenanigans following the jump.

Just as PETA has attempted to rebrand fish a “sea kittens,” perhaps it’s time to look at the bat as just a sort of ugly canary. Bats are so misunderstood — they hardly ever suck your blood, and when they do it is with love. But as we mentioned this morning, the Spurs’ Manu Ginobili…

I had heard of Belgian bodybuilding champ Sarah DeHerdt, but had no idea that she was also a successful track star, and in her spare time enjoyed filming porn. The folks over at Don Chavez.com got hold of some pictures and, well, let’s just say that you don’t want to view many of them while…

How long has it been since we’ve begun a week with a Rams victory? (Taps furiously on calculator). One thing I do know — St. Louis’ win yesterday included its first kneel-down plays since 2006. Once more unto the breach, my friends. If the Rams can win a game, anything’s possible. About Last Night and…